


Grateful

by fhsa_archivist



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Challenge Response, Established Relationship, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-09-13
Updated: 2007-09-13
Packaged: 2019-02-05 18:22:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12799761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fhsa_archivist/pseuds/fhsa_archivist
Summary: John Sheppard had a death wish.Written for slashing_lorne/prompt: what Lorne is grateful for in his lover.  Mild spoiler for SGA: Progeny





	Grateful

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

Sheppard had a death wish.

 

It lurked inside of him, dancing around, lying quietly to let him do his job, but always still there, still waiting to be unleashed, no matter the consequences. 

 

The Replicators knew it. They’d seen it in his mind, pulled the familiar fantasy out of him with their fingers and their thoughts. How many times had he saved Earth by destroying Atlantis in his daydreams. Thinking about it when he piloted the shuttle, when he rode the Daedalus back from Earth, John Sheppard saves the day. It was as if he felt they’d all like him more if he were a dead hero.

 

But he was here now. Alive. Lying next to Evan, warm and breathing, saved by chance from yet another close call. Evan would have been there if he could’ve, would have taken the bullet from the Genii gun, but he knew he couldn’t really save John. 

 

No one could save John. Not from himself.

 

The best he could do was postpone the inevitable for a few days, a month, a year – and be happy for the hours in between now and then. So, for now, he lay beside him, quietly grateful for another night, another sunrise, another day for John to feed the monster within him.


End file.
